A few months ago, I was invited to speak with the leadership team at World Rugby about avoiding burnout and protecting wellbeing. It is a topic that has shaped not just my coaching work, but also my own journey.

I shared a story that still sits with me. Many years ago, I was navigating a big international move, starting a new leadership role in a completely unfamiliar field, and carrying an enormous load of responsibility. The pressure was immense.

On a long-haul flight to Cape Town, a stranger who turned out to be a retired health nurse, leaned over and told me gently: “I can feel the stress coming off you in waves. You need to take care of that before it’s too late.” That moment of kindness sparked a turning point. It pushed me to learn about stress, resilience, and wellbeing, lessons that now sit at the heart of my coaching.

What burnout really looks like

Burnout is not just tiredness. It is being permanently “on” but never on top of things. It is waking up drained, losing joy in what once motivated you, or slipping into cynicism.

It often shows up in the very people who seem most reliable, the high performers, the fixers, the ones who never want to let others down. Yet resilience has limits, and when it is being depleted faster than it is replenished, the cracks eventually show.

The danger is that burnout can begin to feel normal. Exhausted leaders do not build great cultures, inspire innovation, or sustain performance.

It is also important to be clear: burnout itself is a serious condition. If someone is already experiencing clinical burnout, they need time away from work and appropriate medical and therapeutic support. Coaching is not a substitute for that. My role as a coach is to help leaders recognise the early signs and build practices that protect wellbeing, so we intercept burnout before it takes hold.

Six small but powerful practices

The following practices will not “fix” burnout once it has set in. They are, however, powerful in protecting energy, strengthening resilience, and reducing the risk of reaching that point:

1. Treat your energy like a budget – pay attention to leaks and spend it wisely.
2. Move your body, even a little – motion is medicine.
3. Try mindfulness or mono-tasking – focus on one thing at a time.
4. Practise gratitude daily – it trains the brain to notice what is good.
5. Talk to yourself like someone you care about – self-leadership starts with self-compassion.
6. Build in reflection, not just distraction – a short check-in each day resets the system.

This is not about perfection. It is about choosing one thing that signals: my wellbeing matters.

The role of kindness in leadership

In fast-paced, competitive environments, kindness can feel almost radical. Yet research shows that kind teams perform better, innovate more, and retain talent.

Kindness in leadership is not about being soft. It is the strength of checking in on a colleague, the courage to set and honour boundaries, the honesty of admitting when you are struggling, and the generosity of saying, “I have your back.”

These everyday moments of leadership kindness are what changes cultures over time. Often, it takes just one act of noticing, one word of care, to change the trajectory for someone else, just as that nurse did for me on the flight all those years ago.

Questions leaders often ask

When I share these ideas, the conversation often turns to practical challenges. Here are a few questions that came up in discussion with the World Rugby team, questions I hear in many boardrooms:

Q: What can leaders do if their team is clearly stretched but the workload cannot decrease?
A: Start by acknowledging it. Then look at small ways to give people more autonomy, clarity, and recovery time. Even small adjustments in meetings, expectations, or recognition can signal that you care, and that in itself can reduce stress.

Q: Isn’t burnout just part of ambitious work?
A: That belief is common, especially in high-performance cultures. But there is a difference between healthy stretch and chronic depletion. Burnout leads to disengagement, errors, and turnover. Sustainable ambition is possible, but it requires intentional recovery and support.

Q: What is one thing I can do tomorrow to help someone on my team who might be burning out?
A: Check in, not with “how’s work going?” but “how are you doing, really?” Listen. Don’t try to fix, just create space. And if needed, help them access the right support.

Q: What are your favourite personal habits for maintaining wellbeing?
A: Walking (especially outdoors), journaling for five minutes in the evening, and building proper breaks between meetings. I also make a habit of a morning check-in with myself: “How’s my energy? What do I need today?”

Q: How do we create a culture of kindness in a competitive, old-school environment?
A: You model it. You reward it. And you make it part of what “good” leadership looks like. Kindness does not mean being a pushover, or lowering standards, it means being human while still being clear and focused. Culture changes when behaviours change, consistently.

Leadership Insights

• Burnout is a serious condition requiring medical and therapeutic intervention. Coaching is about prevention, not treatment.
• Prevention is not indulgence but leadership responsibility.
• Small, consistent practices protect energy and sustain resilience.
• Kindness is a powerful leadership tool that builds trust, performance, and culture.
• Leaders cannot always reduce workload, but they can reduce stress signals and model sustainable practices.

Reflection for you:
What is one small shift you can make this week to support your own wellbeing?
And what is one act of leadership kindness you can offer someone else?

Culture does not change in a single moment. It shifts in the quiet, everyday choices leaders make.